Prison Documentary 2019 – Life In Super Maximum Security Prison (Lock Down) And Solitary Confinement

Prison Documentary 2019 - Life In Super Maximum Security Prison (Lock Down) And Solitary Confinement



[Applause] I grew up on foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains you know early school for junior bright outside of Charlottesville grew up dirt poor wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks you know dad was an alcoholic and a drug user for the most part he was absent I was the middle son so no matter what happened always got beat forward you know being the middle child so on and so forth whether I had anything to do with it not going to school you know we went to a pretty nice school actually and we will bomb me by far the poorest there you know so we got picked on made fun of and stuff like that and we just started fighting you know he never bullied anybody but I would always pick fights with the bullies cost I hated it I know I know what it feel like to be put down and made fun of so I take the bullets out stuff their heads in the toilets you know that's just all I've ever known was how to fight my dad made me fight you know we sawed off two by fours just to toughen us up and make us hard he said if you get into a fight you damn sure better finish and if you lose I'm gonna beat your ass for that's pretty much I mean unfortunately is pretty much my childhood you know all I've ever known was violence you know it it wasn't the solution to the problem it was just life now I'm doing 1214 years in state of Virginia without parole um that's pretty much it we'll take your handcuffs off show your hands [Applause] the maintaining segregation means to me is extreme loneliness and boring that's the main thing loneliness you know don't care how tough you are I don't care how badass you are you can Bruce Lee it up all day long it gets to you and it hurts like hell I feel like I've been burned alive in the ground and just everybody is just basically walking over top of you you can hear them but they can't hear you that's the way I feel forgotten and that isn't that a comfortable feeling at all when you're alone you tend to reflect on your thoughts a lot you tend to maybe regress into yourself a lot you just have nobody you truly are alone anyone who says you know I would love to be alone I don't think they've been alone so because when they do they'll experience and then they'll hate it I've been in said going on eight years and when you're in here you don't have the contact that you know every time you leave the cell you got a strip and then you're in handcuffs your shackles and you know you got a gun up there in the booth while it's not necessarily pointed at you it only takes a couple seconds you get to go to the shower where you know talk through the doors a little bit you get to go outside on the REC ageist you know for an hour a few days a week so when you're in here you're around hunches about the guys inmates NCOs but you walk alone [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] red onion was opened in August of 1998 it was open to be a security level 6 segregation facility Supermax basically a totally locked down facility for most offenders remain in the cell 23 hours a day seven days a week I came here as assistant warden at the time we open facility we brought offenders in that had negative behavior the worst behaving offenders in the state and we brought them from other facilities to red onion to be able to house them in a more secure environment than the lower levels of silver [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] my name is Micah Kelly I'm originally from South Central Los Angeles I don't know nobody out here I don't have no family no friends out here I don't know a soul in Virginia I came out here to Virginia to drop somebody off and I could amend a couple robberies and the court said Virginia gave me 38 years for two armed robberies if I would have known that I would have got 38 years for two armed robberies like I would have never done it you know to me because I'm like holy shit I'm not throwing my life away 38 years for 200 crates that sounds nuts but I didn't know how serious it was I'm here in Virginia California I got away eight years might have been that you know but I didn't know how serious it was and I know how serious our society suck that when I was a kid I wanted to be a gangster I wanted to be like my father you know in California where I came from we don't really look at gangbanging this is being crazy it's just kind of our culture it's a neighborhood thing like if you from the neighborhood that's your family that's that's that's your friend that's everything to you know be young you got people that you look up to and say you don't want to be like them you know I'm gonna be like him I look at this car you know look at the girls that like I'm like I want to be like him I want to look like him when I get older that's my American and I'm in prison now and they put me in segregation for fighting and being in that cell 23 hours a day it's a mentally challenged and itself just being in that self so long it's a psychological thing you know any and everything that we go through is just in that little box in that little cell trying to like create things to do to keep from going crazy like every day all day like some meat right there up through the time is cleaning up every day when I get up in the morning I clean up when I go to bed at night I clean up no hit the floor the walls the sink just clean everything get it all straight spic and span right but I don't know I think that's just maybe OCD is no no no I'm crazy a little bit the CIO's can't really understand gonna mean they're here half the time with you you know what I mean but at the same time they leave you know and they go back into the real world and they come back this is our world tracking the development of a winter storm here along the East Coast and just starting to see some snow in the North and South Dakota is a bitter cold arctic air from the south that ends the warmer air to the southeast and then we get that storm developing so it's just initially starting to develop now temperatures are dropping [Applause] anyhow your clothes sometimes it can be easygoing and then some days your stress level can be out the roof and it feels like you're doing time because you have to come right back and do it the next morning but you make what you make the best of it and in order to maintain control you have to be firm nice the back wall spread your butt cheeks squat and call working in a supermax prison it'll definitely make you tougher [Applause] maintaining you know your your calm is is quite an achievement I'm dealing with some of these guys and some days it feels like the days is not gonna be in you know it's one thing right after another I'm a unit manager of D building I've been with Department of Corrections now for 16 years I started out as an officer and I was promoted to sergeant then to lieutenant in unit manager the hard part for some staff is because they don't such great alert 12 hours a day and there's the potential for violence when you go home and it's time to relax sometimes it's hard to let your mind relax cuz you're still definitely on guard so I think that adds to the stress of this profession you look at things different when I'm out on vacation or around and big crowds with my family know I'm always looking around yeah nothing s to do with this job you have to just let red onion be ready I didn't you know and it takes a lot X experience to really settle in to the point that you realized this is just a job you know we don't have to leave here my name is Lars Hanson I'm a lifer I have a life sentence and life in Virginia means life without parole or you're in and people who have a release date their mentality is different in an individual I myself who where we have life it's its life and its it's very impact it's it's uh it's depressing it's sad it's you can really overwhelm you so when you have to live at that year on in Iran in you know it can take a toll on you I'm 41 years old I've been incarcerated here in Virginia for almost 20 years now I started getting in trouble you know nothing major is I guess I'm 13 years old but I come from good parents you know they loved me you know they didn't beat me they they taught me to respect people and I have a brother lives in Texas and we're just like it's just enough I made the bad choices and he didn't and you know he's doing really well when I was 17 I shot a guy and I did five and a half years in prison in Hagerstown and I think it kind of messed me up a little bit because it's very violent out there I've told the parole board in stay paroled me and so I went home age 22 and that was home for six months but I still had the mind frame of an inmate mentality when you're incarcerated is you don't want anybody to really disrespect you or take advantage of you or you know stuff like that and so I was at a gas station with my girlfriend and there's two guys I just kept harassing my girlfriend and I and they just kept on kept on and kept on and kept on and I snapped and I stabbed him and I killed him and they gave me a life sentence I mean I'm up here for attempted escape alright actually scale the fence I could cut up real bad I got myself stuck in fence I bled out I woke up on the chopper and then they medevac me save my life brought me to red onion and I've been here in the segregation ever since that segregation is tricky on the inmate because if the inmate is not careful they adapt to it and they start becoming antisocial and become crazy they can lose the mind ask yourself can you live in a bathroom for 10 years it's bad to lock a an individual up and just put them in up in a room and close you know nothing to do it's I guess you could say inhumane and I know that we're inmates and all year and but excuse my language it fucks me up I've been in segregation going on 17 years but I've been locked up for 27 years how do you mind telling me about the original charge you cause i'm robberies and I said I shot one person armed robbery the mother she's wounded well I didn't shoot him it was nice out up in the air told me get on the ground and the bullet ricocheted off two steel i-beam in the ceiling ricocheted off the brick wall and hit the cashier in the foot and that gave me 30 years for the hands-on ricochet bullet they didn't have no intent to hurt nobody I shot up in the air then they even testified I shot up in the air but the judge didn't say it that way is it in my intent to hurt one when I pulled that trigger I cut the warden across the face and the neck and 19 December 26th of 1996 I didn't I won't that won't – good that was a moment of passion and something I've been regretting for the last 17 years almost in 1986 when I did my crimes I had papers sent if I do ten years then I can apply for parole and then in 1995 they come up with this new law that's this I don't get no parole and changed my whole life or outlook on life that made me snap they took my parole in 95 and I stabbed the warden in 96 they sent me no curb and I've been in segregation since I come in the prison system you know fighting slinging ink hustling doing whatever so I'm in population and my Silvia tells me look man you got a guy going around telling his dues that he's gonna break me he said he's gonna knock you out he's gonna rape so okay if I had a knife I'd slit that boys throat he said I'll make you one we used to have a cassette tapes back down you know the plastic case around it took he broke the stuff off took a lighter melted it folded in half did that with another melted it together put three brand-new razors in it and melted it in there next morning we walk out and he's cross to y'all I walk up behind it dude take my left hand I wrap it and I palm his face I put my right knee in his lower back and I stretch him back I slit his throat from ear to ear his friend said oh my god no he don't like Superman I rolled up jumped up ran across the yard soand dude turn around he didn't really cut indeed because she cutting throats ain't easy cuz you got all the ligaments and tendons in there it's it's a lot tougher than people think it is you know but he bleeding like a stuck pig so when he turns around I just start catching him beat the living hell out of it they come run up on me you know before they can tackle me and whatnot I just step up step back cuz I didn't put the work in you know he put the handcuffs home and he taken they bring me up here those rows are still not even make a meeting we had six offenders on mental health precautions there SMI sheets should be on their door list and specifically what the management instructions are from mental health we now have the Glock 40 calibers in position so make sure you have your weapons card I think that's all I've got everything else should be normal have a safe and peaceful day and thank you tell me how good exactly this one ain't come out restraints last night about 12:30 and waiting to get his property bank be reviewed or bound over a guy's property bank you still want eight well you got running today thanks from smooth office doing will we run lobby that would leave it as a break not as them ma'am okay once somebody starts in Corrections they quickly learn that they do make a difference you know it's law enforcement everyday we're protecting the public we save lives and you know that that's fulfilling to you you know you get to go home and lay your head down at night and think about what you've done today and realize that you did make a difference and that you can make a difference in this area you'll see a lot of coal mines for years that was the career that everybody was drawn to because it was readily available sawmills not a lot of high-end jobs in this area then when red-onion prison opened you know there was a lot of job opportunities and at that time there was a lot of coal mines that was shutting down people were being laid off so a lot of people that initially started at these places were people that were coming from the coal mines my father still working in the coal mines this is his 40th year working mines you know I was I was raised in a mining family and that's really in this area that's the the biggest and really about the only industry that's working that red onion it's tough but to me it's a good job compared to Lacombe on the unit managers make rounds daily to see the status of every offender in the building you've got to know the offenders in your housing units it's up it to a situation over the door I hear you when was your charge sorry okay what is a 2:12 charge threatening bodily who did you throw at each door each vendor has a different problem and you know they all want danger yes but yes it's not the anchor that they'll always get and I believe that we have a number of offenders that segregation is what the is what the want is worth is where they want to live there are four reasons they may be afraid living in to live in general population and then you've got some in here that just refuse participate I was what you did last week gonna get you back home to Texas if an offender acts out or misbehaves there's consequences to that if an inmate continues to act up or become disruptive then that's only taking disciplinary action what did you do last week did you flood break the sprinkler head why why did you break this link right here I feel better now did you feel a little bit better name he was feeling better today my psychotic and erotic is that what you don't know what saw Surya wasn't real and what's not experience defeat and somebody told to take me like bad fruit to be we're gonna go on our business red onion the fender would start out as a level zero that would be you get your wreck in the showers on your food and all the basic requirements of life you get the very minimal if you behave and yourselves in compliance your cooperative would stand you will go to level one and at that point you may pick up an electronic item you may pick up a few more dollars of commissary I am the offender continues to cooperate he can go to level two now where he will pick up more privileges they may have some old commissary of course they get your TV I love the TV because I feel like that's not only contact with life that I have you know what I mean as far as the outside world you know I did 13 months straight without a television and on my cherish it I shared my TV now I seen this show the other day on Discovery Channel this dude was building treehouses do do these treehouses up in trees but they was like little mini mansions go tree houses he had spaceships and all kinds of shit I'm like wow I was trying to went to art school and for real man and I get up in the morning I get to shows on TV watch the local news once married with children all the old stuff early in the morning but sometimes I'll watch a movie and see something in the movie brings back memories that reminds me they're not missing out on things that I used to do I get upset about it I cut the TV off I'll switch the channels or whatever you know that show Bear Grylls I mean does basically what I call a survival camping you know he'll go out there with just you know a knife and the clothes on his back and pretty much nothing else and he just lives off the land a lot of stuff I grew up knowing I lived in the woods when I come home from school I wasn't watching TV I was out in the woods you know I don't climb in trees and throwing myself down mountains and you know jumping off of cliffs and rock climbing I love this dog I miss it and you know they got frosted glass on the windows so we can't see how can't see trees or anything 90% of the fenders in Virginia return to the public return to your communities previously offenders that have been in segregation for quite a few years would go straight to the probation office we would take the restraints off of him then he would be sent back to society and we'd expect him to adjust to being in public and now our goal is to take the restraints off here to take the risk inside the facility so the risk is not taken in the public to get out of segregation they must participate in our step-down programs helpless gilfer anger the question I ask is how you learn to express anger race language it's going to be a bug three you know three you think we learn how to express anger do you think that's something learn more or less grew up you learn to find ways to get what you wanted for people sometimes this involved violence intimidation or physical and emotional abuse many men in prison are there as a result of the lessons they've learned when growing up we're trying to prepare them to be successful in a population city offenders that have graduated through the program will go from a segregation environment into a population environment when or are you going participate in challenge truth that's anger management you need the challenge yeah you got it once you complete the challenge program then I can't complain you go to leave segregation because they gave me nine charges to keep back I don't understand that in any type of environment whether it's in the free world or in prison you have to have rules and regulations we all understand that you have to have was otherwise it be chaotic and you be crazy but when you actually have a valid problem if you have a valid issue it's not hurt and it's like you have no voice and being a person and having no voice it hurts at times you know [Applause] these offenders are extremely dangerous offenders they are very violent and have been very violent so when it comes down to those guys there is a lot of risk involved with him look at the program these offenders have jobs growing what we call plastic wire gravy was just nothing with water dude that's all it was like this I'm like the maps you won't touch them now you know the movie or Need for Speed is that Jesse from Breaking Bad yes my pony was mine yeah I recognize they got this new show coming on ABC I believe in game or something dude it look really cool mind games that's it oh never mind that that'd be counseled before the end of the season here working we can talk to each other about bangs on the TV and stuff but again that's good but you're still wearing shackles were still putting handcuffs we still got guards with vest escort you around you know I won't get out of thing that's got to be a way out there's my night Nihon the same thing over and over and over over over again messes with your mind I'm like when I first come to segregation I didn't really have no problems I was just angry but after I stayed in seg so long being isolated and turned me worse I had to go to the psychiatrist get medication like one when I don't take my medication I cuddled myself and cuts all over myself that's what segregation did to me look I got two life sentence without the possibility of parole so I'm in prison for the rest of my life but I want to go home I want to go home that's all I want I want to go home you know you ask a lot of these dudes man you think you going what do they want oh they want cars they want houses they want all these girls and Kim Kardashian and screw all that I just want a good job I'd love to have a wife a couple of kids and a dog that's all I want out of life that's all I ever won I screwed up I ain't blamed with my parents of whatever I did what I did accept responsibility for and if I got to spend the rest of my life in prison then I'm gonna suck it up and deal with it that's the only thing I can do either got to kill myself and I'm too much of a coward to kill myself if I feel myself depressed I'll shake it off and I start working out and I'll work out for at least these four hours and I try to do that to where I'm so exhausted that I don't start dwelling on despair you have to internalize it and then I'm just internalizing so much you know the minds funny you gotta fit like you relevant to somebody you know if you don't feel like you're relevant to nobody in that cell then it make you want to just lose your damn mind you know just go crazy I remember when I started I feel like I knew what I was doing or anything was 20 years old and I was just walking around doing a check and looking into a cell and we had a guy he's in cell 10 who had bitten a hole in his arm and he was I remember stopping and looking at it and been like you know I was in shock you know I didn't really I didn't know what I got myself into to be honest with you and I'm not first react I turned like I turned sheet white I wasn't freaked out and he just kind of looked at me you know and he said and blood was going everywhere Medical had to come over there it's pretty crazy first incident but it kind of broke me in mr. Marsh having lunch today good lunch come did you accept lunch like to talk to me mr. Marsh yeah as you know as I mentioned to you yesterday we're getting ready to send you over to Marion how do you feel about going to Miriam can't say alright we want to send you off and then we'll look for you to come back all healthy again okay okay there have been studies that have shown that segregation can have harmful effects on a person's mental health but I haven't really probably been in a system long enough to see that or to track it you if you will it's just that occasionally we do see that an offender who has a history of no mental health services does all of a sudden start becoming symptomatic and we have no other way to explain that except for the fact that they have been housed in this environment for such a long period of time what's going on why are you back here how old are you now 71 71 how long you been locked up 54 years can you tell us why you're back here severe suicidal thoughts and we put you back here on precautions to kind of keep an eye on you prevent you from harming yourself yeah when you're back in the building what are your concerns about being out of this segregation it seemed like I've forgotten about I think we need you know more hands-on you know treatment you know say you know give me these to do you know other than being the sale of toys the realities you know I hear you it's a challenge for us here it's a yeah we don't care well I can understand why you might have that impression I don't wanna don't throw me negative you know I ain't had a visit in over five years my family's in Richmond and it's like 500 miles round-trip to drive and we only get one hour a visit and you can't touch each other my family used to come up here once a year but now you know my mom 73 years old the rest of the family's dying on me I called my brother once a month and I called my mom once the money that's the only contact I got being in the seal then not really being able to socialize and mingle it's like a world your own and you just like the long you're standing you just like shut down but you could talk to guys on event and stuff like that but that's see if you get a person that you know is uh no sociable like yourself so now I'm gonna bet event over here now the best suck air in and out of the cells so you can like get up on the vent and you can scream and holler at the different inmates in the different cells that's connected to yourself she you make accessible I got a little white piece of paper making little pieces and play chess on the vent there's something just to do just the pastime you know just so you get on there and play chess like you Bobby Fischer's you know it's where we communicate kind of privately without other people hearing us this pot only has two people on advantages for you and one other person but in other pods you know you have four people on a vent being able to open up it so it really helps me to think clearly instead of thinking in a negative way or a way that I shouldn't they I mean handsome we're only been together now so we know a lot about each other and he knows me like he can tell him my voice when something's wrong like he might call me now get up and be like hey he's like are you all right today you know he'll hear my voice if I don't want to talk it's like cuz that he knows me that much but you know and he'll know if I'm in a good mood cuz my tone of voice so it's our telephone system wewe kind of failed each other even though you can talk to other dudes on the event eventually you get ins on smart hands pump it's just a matter of time before he starts running this mouth just a matter of time before he starts calling you a snitch and a faggot and all these other things you know cussing you out they'll get to banging on the wall but you're trying to sleep and you want to get to because they won't let up and they'll bang seven eight months at a time and you have the lights on all day long there's no switches on the lights and you're just stuck in that cell any drives you crazy [Applause] if you just sit and just listen to all the different cells you were here a thousand arguments all day every day just about nothing it's an anger and the frustration everybody feels inside themselves you have this you have this this justice this rage that just builds and builds and builds and builds and builds and little things would just make you go crazy for instance mail that's like the highlight of the day you know when you see their office you go past your door and if you ain't got no milk coming through that door you know the head back admitted I can really be a damper in your day he's like you didn't have a piece of bread and tray hope you get two pieces of bread on your tray if I was missing a piece of bread on my tray I would explode they didn't run mail yesterday they didn't remember cuz of whatever reason they didn't run mail for walk around the sill for our you could just walking circles and circles and circles and circles and circles for hours and just just think you can't move can't move you can't just walk around the circles I don't expect the administration to understand what we go through behind them doors there is no rules for the administration they have no rules they make up their own rules they didn't come tell me why they didn't run now they just told me that they didn't run the mill if I have a salt on my train give me my salt I want my salt now you know the mean like it just but it but when it was that it's like two totally different realities and Monday comes around I'm looking for this male and I don't get it but don't nobody tell me that that don't Maceo st. have to tell me the only body come around and say a and not passing the metal out because of whatever and if we don't get what we deserve and when we supposed to have and even even if we speak up and we snap out and go crazy because we're not getting opposed to have and their guidelines and then what Dean is being disruptive to the security and there's all these different things that they stack on you we have loose stack six feet above our head they don't follow the rules that they have in place but they want us to follow every single rule by the teeth walking in circles and just laying down all day and it makes you just want to just rebel and just be like I don't care about none of the rules now I don't care because even the rules that I follow or smiled a piece of bread and I'm saying fuck them for real man I'm like fucking you know because in that cell you just got so much anger how in the fighting no like you gotta come in this cell and you gotta you gotta beat me up you gotta beat me up you gotta come in here I want to fight you now I just got so much pain but up inside me I'm gonna just fill it you know I'm saying give it to me like don't play with me just give it to me all the way in their sale don't nothin matter and I used to act out I used to throw feces on the guards feces on the inmates get the extraction team officers to come at my cell and fight them and get gassed up he'd beat up and strapped down and five-point restraints and all that I've seen a lot of people get hurt really bad over the years during cell entries busted knees ankles elbows arms you know inmates actually getting their hands on an officer it's very dangerous I remember one time I got together you know a few guys and we ended up covering our windows and just having the battle with administration and so they end up coming in myself and we start just having to just a full-fledged physical combat I used to love it I mean it really did I still love it why getting fired up um you have to get in a certain state of mind before you go into a cell and fight another human being its combat its combat it's kind of like the same feeling you get when you score a touchdown or hit a home run you got to get pumped up when it comes down to using force to enforce rules regulations whatever it may be we will do what we have to do when you're dealing with higher level offenders their history a lot of times it's extreme violence so we have to treat them as such bottom line my job is to protect public safety and protect those staff they're here protect the offenders that encompasses a big picture so we have to consider the big picture what is best what is safe what is safe for all I'm 35 now and basically from the time I was 11 years old I've been incarcerated I've only spent maybe a year and a half on the street when I was up 10 years old my dad left my mom so me and my brother we went back and forth between my dad and my mom and neither one of them wanted us so they put herself you know in the foster system so there was like a 17 year old foster kid there and he started bullying my brother so I grabbed a pool he one just started wailing on him with it and beat him down and you know so I got kicked out of there and I went to the group home one day this place had up banana splits I never had none even to this day I've never had one I've always wanted one you know I was like the quintessential thing as a child as a banana split and the dude there wouldn't give it to me I get mad I'm gonna kill myself if you don't oh I don't think you will you ain't got it in you I grab before can I shove it through my wrist I was about maybe 11 at the time it took me to the hospital you know you got kicked out went to another foster home started getting in trouble I stole a car yeah busted enough I go to juvie you go to juvie no prison in Virginia you fight every day you know and I did several years there and that doesn't mean I've won every fight I've got my ass what more times than I've worn but they don't call it gladiator school for nothing so I make my way out and I was living with my grandma at the time and I tried to join the army but they told me that I had to be six months off parole and probation before I could join got a job working electricity in Charlottesville that was Fong's I've always been good with my hands and uh my grandma needed a stove hers was falling apart so for Christmas you know I go and I get it uh you know put a little down payment on it but I get fired and now I can't make the payments there's no way in hell I'm gonna let them come repossess my grandma stove I'm like man you know what screw it I can't get a job I know I'm good it I'm breaking the house steal a couple guns I steal a brand-new 97 a Subaru Legacy station wagon but I still a bunch of all the stuff I got a gun got bullets for the gun I'm here to dub interstate 29 120 miles per hour in a station wagon I'm kidding you know I'm like 19 years old and cars almost out of gas I pull into the store I fill up I don't got no money on me so I walk in I grab a coke I walk up to the store owner and I just put a gun in his face and give me your money so he pulls the money out of his wallet and he gives it to open cash register give me the money he opens him symantec him on y'all give it to me he said no it's a man if you don't I'm going to kill you he looked me square in the eyes and he say young man I don't think you will I shot him in the chest he fell behind the counter I reached old shot him twice in the back I walked down the counter walk back up and I stood over top of him and I shot him six more times in the back of the head Oh took the money and I left comes the snow to variable pressure form enough wall that seemed further knew that over the weekend that's their spreading north at eastern area through these morning hours we are expecting disrupt yourself from West Virginia across the mason-dixon line what you don't do when somebody attacks you I mean go do what you gotta do it's not gonna matter what program you put in front of somebody so when I found out they was bringing me back I was pissed I was mad no one that I was coming back to long term segregation I start you in my mind right because we should come over here you don't know how long it's gonna be before they let you go and send you back out into the prison world back in the population [Applause] I know I tried those feet and that's why I'm here I have no one to blame but myself but at the same time I'm not a violent inlet and I have 18 years of demonstrating I saw you put me back in general population I will not mess up as there was a slip a lot of stuff going on in my head at the time I regret it every day I regret it every day right we'll never be forgotten you can't erase the fun this is not the end it's still working progress how long in words only thing I can take you like that but it is working progress okay I'm suspended always told that and then it's still never I guess you know progressing I guess you've had that up to 19 year population you fruit then at the time that you can capitalize on that opportunity you slip made a mistake from this point you're working to regain that opportunity you lost do your actions ah any person I I would love to progress off of right onion no no [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] that door closes and here in that confined spot I could imagine for real it would be awful being in here anyway that oscillation would be something I don't think I could deal with easily either I think not being able to roam around would really really take a toll on me I don't think I've actually thought about it as far as how I would act if I was behind the door I killed a man should I've lost my life for the act I did I took that man's life I took him away from his wife from his children from his grandchildren I took him away from his business who knows what happened to his family after he lost his stolen lost his job there's so many consequences that could have came from my actions I took that man's life am I being boost enough in my opinion no not even close but seven eight years of segregation isn't working because all it does is make you angry it makes you more frustrated all is doom has turned us into caged animals I call it reality TV you know I make my own reality television entertainment and I got to handle dog I like the hot on their tail I don't tell you know just do the entertainment to you know keep myself entertained China here you know I'd I'd be having suicidal thoughts and so I trying to keep myself me most the time right you know looking at see you can't see out the window held on and I'm that's a whole tool to technique cause on the two-year each nother brain you know the brain needs on Sesame my bikini Morgan the exercise sensory deprivation everyone's goal that's why they can only do every day is exactly the same it's exactly the same every single day is exactly the same and their sale by yourself it's like you're not in prison and it's like it's somewhere else you're just away from life he's away from life period I don't know if hocus was keeping me going I just think it's my inner strength I guess my eye teeth are gonna find the strength imma kill myself you know it's a hundred two so I don't kill what's helped yet so you know I'm just trying to I'm just trying to make it the handcuffs and shackles been wearing them for seventeen and a half years that's a long time I've done more time in segregation than some guys got for murder I ain't killed nobody I've been doing what they told me to do I've been acting like I ain't been getting the no trouble as long as I knew that I don't see no reason why they can't you help me out of certain Grayson cuz I'm gonna die in prison but what I did doesn't merit no Jeff sentence the judge and give me a death sentence why you can give me a death sentence keeping me desegregation for the rest of my life is a death sentence that's to look out again life ain't working without hope what's the point of having a lot you just exist in 0.3 I'm tired I'm frustrated and I'm a little bit borderline depression so to speak you know think every human deals with it regardless of where you're fantasizing you know just about going to different places you know I I create entire landscapes in my mind you know I have that ability to where I can close my eyes I can actually paint it I can actually see it I can actually walk to it sort of like a 3d model on a computer um I'll pretty much do it every day I'll cross my hands behind my back and I'll just close my eyes you know I just we like to exist and then I'm able to step into it sometimes it's childhood places that I've been you know like the woods when I was growing up when it got too bad at home I would just take off into the woods in the woods I was comfortable I was safe I didn't have to worry about getting the hell beat out of it when you're walking through the forest you know climbing up the mountains you know and you feel the sponginess of the pine needles underneath your feet you know the branches you know brushing up against your clothes the fresh air you hear the squirrels chittering at you because you're invading their territory the birds swooping around your head you know peace you know contentment you know that this right here is what God created this world to be he didn't create it for violence he didn't create it for strife he didn't create it for murder rape robbery you know lies and deceit and trickery he didn't create it for all that when you're out there and you're forced by yourself you've known your twenty thirty miles away from the closest person as far as you know you did a true glimpse of what eating was you know you get a true glimpse of what life is supposed to be you know it's your own little personal utopia you know it's a perfect environment you know it's the one place where I was happy

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About the Author: Sam Caldwell

43 Comments

  1. Humans need people interaction, decent food, sunlight, and productive things to do during the day which the prisoners get none of.

  2. Have to wonder what this place is like when the cameras are not there to capture events… Which level of Dante's Hell would Red Onion be situated upon? For those that may be interested look up Black Dolphin prison in Russia, which is probably more brutal than Red Onion.

  3. This place is freakn scary. I've seen a Lot of prison shows and even been locked up more than a few times. And this place is creepy as shit.. I feel for them

  4. There is a big difference in being alone and being forced to be alone I love being alone but I also know that I can go out and see people in the world anytime I want when you're being forced to be alone you know you're trapped and that's where you're at.

  5. “If I would have known I would have gotten 38 years for two armed robberies I would have never done it.”

    What the absolute fuck did you expect? A timeout?

  6. I think is has a lot do with mental health. I think we all make mistakes in life, some bigger than the others but I also believe everyone deserve a second or even third chance. These people grew up in a different environments, they were educated in that way so they don't know anything else than that, that's why they should be re-educated. I don't think is it humane to live in those conditions no matter what crime you've committed.

  7. Yeah, I got about halfway through and realized I just don’t give a fuck. These idiots did it, they need to pay. Nuff said

  8. for the grace of God go I. It could be me in there, i'm pretty twisted i guess but idk, glad it ain't me in there.

  9. they are in there because of the serious animalistic actions they committed now they want you to feel sorry for them yet they showed no mercy to people who died at their hands hard to feel sorry for them and they are there also caused of all the beatings, throat slashing and murders they did when they got to prison they did not start off in solitary Dennis crying about I didnt kill anyone but he got in seg because he slashed warden in neck 1996 & committed armed roberries shot man in arm if he wasnt doing that man would not have been shot

  10. He said if I new I was getting 38 years for armed robbery I would not have done it lol lol…yes he thought he would get nominee for father of the year…lol dumb ass..lol

  11. I’m gonna give this the video thumbs down for trying to trick the viewers. This documentary is old. It wasn’t made in 2019.

  12. This is almost like Black Dolphin in Russia. I felt bad for the guy who got 27 years for shooting a gun into the air, and then having parole being taken off the table. And why the frosted glass? That's awful. They take away even the simplest of pleasures.

  13. And some cultures ask why police are ANGRY? Well, look at the animals in these cages, f*cking vile trash! Every human has free will, don't blame anyone except "THE INDIVIDUAL!" @TAKEOUTTHETRASH

  14. Nice to watch a documentary with no annoying narrator or overly dramatic music. I wish more Docs were made like this.
    I bet having the film crew there must have been some kind of mental release for these guys. 18:19 one happy dude!

  15. Segregation should be made illegal or at the very least be limited to a set time not for years that is mental torture disgusting where is the human rights 🤷‍♀️.

  16. I had a rough start to life with my two sisters , poor , disfunctional upbringing , we witnessed alcohol abuse every day , but man my older sister and I made it . I have a job , a roof over our heads , two amazing kids and wife that are strong , intelligent , beautiful and respectful .

    I wouldn’t change a thing . I pray for the inmates I hope they find peace within . Cheers .

  17. 3rd world country… A country is judged by the way they treats its prisoners, and Americans are happy with treating non violent offenders as monsters. They have created a system that turns ordinary people extremely violent, and wonder why they can't get their act together. It's fucking disgusting!!

  18. "been a person and having no voice hurts at times" You mean like the people who you robbed with a weapon.

  19. ‘ If I knew I was going to get 38 years..God Dam..!
    I wouldn’t have run in that shop, face planted the old guy with the end of my shotgun, stabbed the dog up and took the old lady’s lifesaving at point blank leaving her mental and emotional scared for the rest of her life…
    Twice..!’

    ‘ I just would have brought a Twinkie bar and gone home.. wtf, give me a break man..😭

  20. I have had neighborhoods. It was not a thing to be a gang member. We worked, we paid bills. My brother lives in a suburb outside of Memphis. Large lots, houses beautiful and quite a lot of black neighbors who worked to get there. I couldn't afford to buy one.

  21. Where people we don’t need at all go to. To be forgotten and die off. Need one of these for each state.

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